Thursday, March 31, 2011

Now serving #14: Sale of the week

You know you have a bad baseball team when #14: Your Team Store has all of it's items marked on sale at 65% off and that was just on the opening day of the baseball season.

Now Serving #13: No hitter frills

You know you have a bad baseball team when #13: Your top pitcher has three no hitters in the last three games that he's pitched. However he's walked 32 batters and beaned 5 more in those 3 games he's pitched.

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Now serving #12: Pitchers do it better!

You know you have a bad baseball team when #12: When all of the pitchers have better batting offensive stats than most of the infielders and outfielders who play daily where as the pitcher gets an at bat every fifth game due to the 5-man rotation!

Monday, March 14, 2011

Now Serving #11: Pee in the cup!

You know you have a bad baseball team when #11: The whole ball team, the mascot, the bat-boy, and the teams' radio announcer all get suspended because they all failed their "pee in the cup" drug tests.

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Now serving #10: The pinstripes go how far???

You know you have a bad baseball team when #10: Your entire pitching rotation receives invitations to a free "Jenny Craig" trial offer.

Now serving #9: Watch them bounce

You know you have a bad baseball team when #9: Lulu the "Kissing bandit" refuses to even attempt to run after any of the team's ball players and instead goes after the team's mascot.

Monday, March 7, 2011

Now serving #8: Get your hot nuts here!

You know you have a bad baseball team when #8: The food vendors make more money in a day than what the team does in a week of ticket sales.

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Now Serving #7: Topps helps your team improve!

You know you have a bad baseball team when #7: The Topps Company photoshops other player's heads onto the heads of the team's players just so that it will improve the quality of the team's cards.

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Now Serving #6: Your Mom

You know you have a bad baseball team when #6: Your mom plays on the same team and leads in almost every offensive category for the team while you're stuck "riding the pine"!

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Now Serving #5: Bring on the hits

You know you have a bad baseball team when #5: Your team website has more hits than all of the players combined hits for the last five years.

Now Serving #4: You're never gonna score

You know you have a bad baseball team when #4: The team can seem to only score runs when the player up to bat is "beaned" and the bases are loaded.....that is if they ever manage to get the bases loaded.